Followup to a previous post: No, I don't really do anything connected with the metaphysical anymore. I might do a 'insight' (not a reading just a glance) into a question a friend might have but that's usually few and far between times. Perhaps I should tell a bit about my spiritual past.
I was raised to be able to make my own spiritual choices in life. Unlike those homes where the parents indoctrinate their children into their beliefs I was allowed to choose my own path. When I was growing up my parents attended an Anglican church. I think I attended two or three of the Christmas masses but by the time I reached 14 they were no longer going to them. So I guess from the age of zero to seventeen I was raised to believe in God but for what I knew of him I would consider myself more Agnostic than Christian.
When I was around seventeen or eighteen I was into the thick of things. My abilities to "see" things, both dark and light, was quite active and it was at that time I got involved in Christianity. A few of my friends were involved in it and through peer pressure they wanted me to be too. I was basically told that if I could see "darkness" and wasn't on the side of the light then I would be drawn into evil. It kinda reminds me of a condensed version of Star Wars. I chose to remain "on the fence" where I think everyone should be. I couldn't commit to their rather biased view of the world and after leaving for college I lost touch with them. In college, and for times after, I went through some very dark periods in my spiritual life, however, I don't think they were caused by the devil (sorry). I think I was a small town young adult raised with no real boundaries or guidelines in the spiritual realm and when faced with the challenges of life I didn't know what to do. I'll discuss that more at another time.
As an adult I drifted along and called myself an "Agnostic" for most of it. I believed in a "higher power" but couldn't get on board with some guy in the clouds looking down at us and allowing bad things to happen for no reason.
In 1999 I met someone, that I am still long distance friends with today, who introduced me to Neo-Paganism. And after that I began a new chapter in my life which has since evolved to where I am today. Which, I will discuss much further at another post.
I just expressed a similar attitude about Canada under our previous government. We have fallen globally to the point where we aren't seen as the "humanitarians" we are (were), where we aren't known for our contributions to peace and harmony... but instead for our destruction of the environment and our blind following of certain leaders into wars we can not win 'that way'. I'm not even American and I felt a sense of longing listening to the words. I even got a lump in my throat when he said "We sure used to be". It's true, America WAS once the greatest country in the world, but it certainly isn't now.
But now, now we are waking up thanks to a Prime Minister who remembers what it means to be "Canadian". Now we see that by focusing on what is just and what is right that we can rebuild our national image. By working together we can resolve our issues and move forward. This is what America needs to do.
It needs to stop and look at what made America great in the past. It's not about blind pride, it's not about inferiority. It's about unity, community, it's about working as one to build a stronger neighbourhood and in turn a stronger country. It's about holding out your hand when your fellow man needs a help up from the ground, but being ready to kick the butt of the one who knocked him down to begin with.
It's about being leaders, not in war, not in conflict and murder and, as he said incarceration, but to be leaders in technology that helps our planet, in programs that feed our hungry and care for our sick. I remember all the years I lived in the US I kept thinking, "where are the skyscrapers?" "where is the base on the moon?" "where is the great leader 'America' that I heard so much about growing up?"
It's about remembering that America (and Canada) are nations built on strength, not military, but the strength of community, of humanitarianism, strength of character and integrity.
OMG ok, I'm ranting and clearly too tired... but you know, as a Canadian, I don't hate the US or Americans... I feel sorry for them. You guys down there need to wake up and see your paranoia and fear are destroying you. Stop watching idiots and start remembering who you really are. You can be 'great' again (just like Canada will be soon).
Ever have one of those moments where you cross paths with someone you were attracted to years ago, but, at that moment, you can’t remember who they are or where you know them from. I’m sure we’ve all had that one person in our life that we wanted to get to know more but were too afraid, at the time, to ask.
I remember way back in college when I would eat lunch almost every day at the local K-Mart diner because I liked the waitress (back when we called them waitresses) that worked there. I ended up spending several hundred dollars on burgers and fries over several months and never got up the nerve to ask her out.
Well, that happened to me today, I think. But this time I saw it from a couple years down the road. I was shopping at one of the stores here in Red Deer and when I got up to the cashier she seemed familiar to me. I tried to think of where I knew her from and at the end of the transaction I hesitated. I said “sorry, I just get the feeling like I know you from somewhere”. Well, she said the same thing. Neither of us could recall where we had seen the other, but unlike before now I know her name and she knows mine. Apparently she has worked in several places in the past, and mentioned Walmart, but I’m pretty sure that wasn’t it.
It wasn’t until after I left, and subsequently returned to look at an item I forgot to check out (and no way in heck I’m paying $25 for something that is only $7 at Walmart) that I remembered who she might be.
A couple years ago, when I first moved to Alberta, I used to buy my gas in Rocky Mountain House. I now buy my gas in Red Deer for two reasons. The first, economical; gas always seems to be cheaper in Red Deer and with my card from Esso I get an extra 1-1/2 cents off (paid 80.9c per litre yesterday, sweet!). The second reason is because my regular clerk left the gas station I frequented in Rocky. She was always friendly, great looking and, well, human. I remember the one time I went in there she shared a video she was watching on YouTube. In the video an elderly woman was crossing the street and some guy in a sports car leaned on his horn at her. Well the old lady turned and started beating on the car with her cane or something. It was priceless. Yeah, totally unrelated to this overall story, but you remember things like that when you either like the person showing you or you like the overall environment you were viewing it in. Just think of all the Christmas movies you remember and you get what I mean on the latter.
So anyways, when she left, for whatever reason, I think I might have bought gas there maybe a half dozen more times at the most. It didn’t feel the same without her there and let’s face it I was only spending 2 cents more per litre to see her smiling face behind the till. The sad thing is, as luck will have it, today we went our separate ways and I have my doubts I will see her again.
It’s those moments that we fail to leap that we trip on years later.
Question of the Day - Hotel bedding, fuzzy or crisp?
I have been staying in hotel rooms since I was a teenager and I have found there are predominantly two types of bedding - fuzzy and crisp.
Fuzzy bedding is, as the name implies, fuzzy. It looks scratchy, usually in beige or brown colours and, in colder climates, gives you the feeling of warmth and security. It is more commonly found in Bed and Breakfasts and lower budget motels that don't have full time housekeeping services. Many phrases that would be associated with it include being at home or visiting grandma's house.
Crisp bedding, as the name sounds, is clean, sharp, it reminds you of every hotel room you see in advertising. In warmer climates it can make you feel cooler just by its precision, in cold climates it provides warmth through layering. If you pay $100 or more a night for a hotel room you usually expect it to have 'crisp' bedding. It is measured by its' quality, the thread count, the higher the number the finer the quality. Phrases associated with it include quality, prestige, style and professional.
I have stayed in rooms ranging from $25 to $200 a night in everywhere from small towns to major metropolitan centres and I have to say that, personally, I prefer crisp bedding. It is quite simple really, vanity. I feel when I stay in a hotel it should feel like the $100 a night I'm paying for the room. If I wanted to sleep in grandma's house I'd have stayed on someone's sofa.
There are several things I look for in a hotel room, and they differ from what I look for in a motel room.
1. HELLO? HELLOOOO? When I rent a hotel room I expect there to be a 24 hour reception desk. It's funny really because I rarely ever contact the front desk. I did once at a hotel in Vancouver after the couple in the unit next door got a bit rowdy and I called security. The next day I said something and they looked up the report from the night before and gave me a room on the other side of the floor. Nice! I guess I just feel safer knowing that someone is "at the gate" so to speak, a throwback to the old medieval castle times perhaps. On the other hand, when I rent a motel room I expect there to be a main office but I don't feel someone needs to be "on duty" from 10pm to 5am. I know, strange.
2. STAYING CONNECTED The one thing I expect in both hotel and motel rooms is either free wifi or free internet. I will not stay in a hotel/motel without it. Period. It is not negotiable. It is the FIRST thing I look up when I check the Hotel Information and if it is not listed then I go on to the next choice. Sorry but this is the 21st century - get with it if you want my money.
3. WIPING UP THE COMPETITION In a hotel it should, of course, come with clean towels and spares so I never have to "ask" for them while I'm staying there. Oh, and I believe in using the same towels over so I especially like the hotels that encourage you to re-hang towels you plan to use again (to conserve water). If there is enough towels and such in the room then I usually put up the DO NOT DISTURB sign and sleep in. I know that housekeeping comes with the rate but I'll take over waking up and not having to get up over a little triangle pattern on my toilet paper roll each day.
4. EVERYBODY’S FREE TO FEEL… CLEAN I want my free bottle of soap and my free hand soap. I'm paying $100 a night for the room I think they can spare $1 for all those little sample size soaps and such. I expect those in a hotel room but not in a motel room. I'm not actually sure why. I guess in a motel room I'm likely to be paying a lot lower rate per night so I expect less amenities to be included in the price.
5. 257 CHANNELS AND NOTHING ON I prefer, in both hotels and motels that I can lay on one bed or the other and be aligned with the TV, or be able to turn the TV so I'm looking straight at it. I understand the idea of placing the TV between the two beds but then neither gets a decent view of it. Oh, did I mention, when I rent a hotel or motel room it includes two Queen beds. It frustrates me when a TV is bolted, fixed in one position to the wall. I mean, if you are that concerned someone is going to steal it at least cough up a few more bucks for the adjustable mounting harness so us honest people can at least watch it. I have to laugh when I read about people who complain how small a hotel room is and they rented the one with a single King bed in it. You can't have it both ways folks, either you want a big bed or you want room to move around. I prefer the latter myself but then I'm also sleeping alone.
6. NOT UNTIL I’VE HAD MY COFFEE I like a room that has a coffee maker. I'm not a social person before I have my morning coffee and I could care less about continental breakfasts. I know, it falls under the free soap rule that hey if the hotel is $100 a night then I should take advantage of the $2 croissants but I don't. If I am in the hotel to "get away from it all" I'm more likely to make a cup of coffee (in my room) slip the DO NOT DISTURB sign on my door and hide out watching "Pawn Stars", "Storage Wars" and "Border Security" all day long. I despise that VanHouten coffee though, it's probably some of the worst coffee I've had in my life and if the hotel has it in my room I will go out and get a Timmies instead.
7. ROOMS WITH A VIEW I like a room with some sort of view, which is probably why I rarely stay in motels. In a hotel it doesn't matter if the view is a field of parking lots or a barren field I like to have something to look out at. I particularly like a room that faces the sunrise. I have no idea why (you'd think after years I would figure all of this out but I haven't). I actually do not like sunrises, when I am outside. I am now and always have been a fan of sunsets, it's probably one of the things that drew me to live in Kincardine (it's million dollar sunsets over Lake Huron). The weirdness comes with hotel rooms. I don't know why but for some reason I suddenly love watching the sunrise from a hotel room window. I think it might be the fresh feeling that comes from watching a city come to life in the morning. It's quiet, then the light of dawn begins to appear. The lights of the city flick off and the traffic slowly begins to build on the streets. It's the world waking up, but it's also soundproofed - the difference between being in a hotel room and being out on the street first thing in the morning.
8. FOOD LAND NEARBY It's nice if the hotel has a restaurant attached. I think about twenty-five percent of the hotels I've stayed in over the years had restaurants. If I am in a city I don't know it's nice to have a restaurant at "home base" so I can do my business or whatever and come back to a meal. If I'm somewhere like Red Deer, a city I'm very familiar with, then I will usually revert to what I know. I will seek out a meal at Parkland Mall, or one of the restaurants near the west side or one or two in particular downtown. A hotel does not need to have a restaurant for me to want to stay there. I do prefer, however, that it is near to restaurants or a mall. I frequently stay at a hotel on Gasoline Alley in Red Deer. It is close to Timmies, various fast food restaurants, Costco and a Cinema.
9. GOING UP? It doesn't matter how many floors the hotel has I don't want to be on the ground. I don't have a fear of fire or anything that discourages me from being on the higher floors - in fact, with me, the higher the better. I do not like hearing car doors slamming all day or looking out the window and see someone in their car staring at me. The highest floor I think I was ever on was in the thirties, the lowest was the second floor.
10. CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW? Who uses a phone in the hotel anymore? Oh I'm sure there are still people that use it to make calls but most people, who can afford a hotel room, have a cellphone.
11. BARTENDER… NOT TONIGHT No interest at all in a bar or club especially attached to the hotel. The last thing I want is some drunk pissing on my truck or partying until 3 in the morning. I can't remember the last time I went to a hotel bar... oh wait, yes I can. It was in Winnipeg at a hotel near the airport. I remember because I asked for a Rye and Coke and she looked at me like I'd be disappointed "Sorry, all we have is Crown, is that ok?" Umm hell yeah!
12. ROOM SERVICE? I don't need room service but I do want Room Delivery. I don't care how good the Sandwich is from the hotel restaurant it's not worth $15. I'll spring $30 for a pizza though and I definitely have to get it delivered to my room. Interesting to note it was cheaper to order a 14" Hawaiian pizza with a 2Litre Pepsi in Calgary than it was in Red Deer. I noticed too that the nicer hotels will offer a WHAT TO DO booklet in the room that lists attractions, churches, and events in the region. I rarely read it but it's nice to see them offer it to guests to make them feel welcome and want to get out and about in the community they are visiting.
13. PARKING That's just a standard, the hotel or motel must have parking attached to the hotel or motel. Probably the worst hotel I stayed at was in the U.S. It was a very snowy day and the parking was a single strip running along the back of the building. You had to drive up a steep driveway along the side then negotiate through the piles of snow to get in and out of the spaces. I was not overly impressed but with a heavy snowfall coming down I didn't have any choice but to bed down for the night and wait out the worst of the storm. I like hotels that offer a plug in for the winter months but I don't think I've ever used one yet, it's still nice to have the option though.
Well I think I’ve gone on long enough with this one. Night.
Followup to previous blog: Well it turns out, from further research, that the 'spirit doll' might be faked. Yeah, probably, but then did people really think they were buying land on the moon? I mean, it's EBAY, known for its strange and unusual items. It won't stop me from buying the doll, and who knows, it COULD be real. Just because people don't believe and, oh gee look it doesn't work for them, doesn't mean it's not real. Who knows, it's still kind of cool.
The Question of the Day is: What was your most terrifying dream (nightmare) as a child?
Actually, I don't have an answer for that one. I didn't have my first nightmare, that I can recall, until I was about eighteen years old and even it wasn't that scary. I guess that's why horror movies rarely scare me because I wasn't conditioned as a child to be afraid of fictional things like dreams. My first nightmare, my friend and me were in his house and I remember going to walk out the back door and our family dog was there. The dog looked up at me and then tried to attack me like it had rabies or something. The thing was, we had a poodle cross, she was barely the size of a coffee maker. Ooooh scary, not.
Nowadays I really have to psyche myself up to find a horror movie entertaining. I turn off the lights (all of them including any from electronics), wear wireless headphones and curl up under the covers, all that just to set the mood to allow my mind to experience fear.
The irony is, in the real world, I can be spooked quite easily and I am definitely not one to poke around alone in an allegedly haunted forest or house. Hey, why tempt fate?
After my last blog a couple of you asked me what I meant by being able to sense people in trouble or danger but not accurately or early enough to be of help to them. Well, I'll give you a few examples I've had over the years.
The most recent example that comes to mind was the old man with Alzheimers. There was a report on the local radio that an elderly man had wandered from the home where he was being cared for and they were concerned for his safety. They were looking in the immediate area and west towards the downtown core believing that he might be returning to old neighbourhoods he was familiar with. I heard the story and immediately heard a voice "no, he went to the east". I didn't think about it anymore until later that day when they reported that he had been found - in a neighbourhood a few kilometres east of his home.
In another incident a man called 9-1-1 and reported that he had been in a car accident but he wasn't sure where he was. He gave a rough idea of where he might have been driving at the time of the crash. The police and helicopters were dispatched across the city looking for the man. This time I heard and saw it from his perspective. "I see a field, and trees, a line of trees, he's away from the road. He's south not west. He's disoriented for some reason. The car went off the road". Of course, what do you do with that sort of information? You can't call the police, they'd think you were nuts. Well, after a couple hours the police received a call from a truck driver about suspicious damage alongside the road. It turns out, the intoxicated driver, heading in a southerly direction, lost control, went over the curb, down a hill, past a line of trees and ended up behind them, upside down, in a field. He wasn't seriously hurt, but he was recovering from his drinking binge when he called 9-1-1.
In a third instance, there was a young boy who got into an argument with his parents. He ran away and police were searching for him. I thought about him a moment and got "I'm so cold. I'm afraid. I see trees. I'm lost". I already knew he was dead, or dying at the time I sensed him. And, the police found him, out in the woods, no protective clothing. He froze to death. That was probably the saddest one I've had yet.
I've had a couple, what I would call, "temporary possessions", moments when I opened myself up or were the most vulnerable to strong emotions from shadows or past lives perhaps?
This is the scariest one. Many years back I attended a Christmas party. Now, those of you who know me today know that I don't drink much and I never drink enough to get intoxicated. This sobering effect is the result of that one night back in the early 2000's. I wasn't in a partying mood really but I went to the party anyways because my presence was 'expected'. After a couple hours I had managed to get several drinks in me of varying alcoholic content. Somewhere around eight glasses ranging from a shot to a highball I'd had quite enough - at least my stomach thought so.
It was around the time that I was getting ready to walk home that I felt a wave of emotion flow over me. I was literally incapacitated by the feeling that I was in someone else's body. My mind started playing out this role like I was watching it on a movie screen and I was powerless to stop or pause it. I was in a suit, nothing fancy, but a decent suit, dark blue, and I was walking out of my house. I remember seeing the street. It was a typical "American" suburb. I don't remember a lot of trees. I remember a large plain grass yard with a single strip of concrete slab sidewalk running down straight from the door to the sidewalk along the road. I vaguely remember a driveway beside me to my left. There was a car parked on the street, it looked like one from the 1960s. It was a sunny day, blue skies with very little cloud. I could feel the sunlight shine down on me as I went to leave the house. I remember hearing noise down the street, a kid playing perhaps. It was a typical morning. I heard and felt everything around me as though I were there in that scene, when in reality I was doubled over in the back parking lot trying to puke my guts out (I know, nice image eh).
I went to step out of the door, I didn't even have it closed behind me when a man quickly approached me from up the sidewalk. He was a tall, thin man with sandy brown hair and he was dressed like a blue collar worker, decent shirt and pants but not expensive. I went to speak to him as he approached and before I could say anything he took out a black handgun and shot me. I didn't feel any searing hot pain from the bullet. I felt cold, wet, a strange sensation in my upper body but I don’t think it was my chest, it was slightly lower. It was so fast, so unexpected. The next day my friend told me that, at the time, I was in tears and all I kept saying was "He shot me, why did he shoot me?" I remember feeling sadness and confusion. I don't know who he was or why he shot me. I know that “I”, whoever, was a law enforcement officer, maybe a US Marshall or FBI, located in Arizona. It wasn’t Phoenix, I’m thinking more like Maricopa or one of the smaller “city-like” communities, back in the mid-1960s. The funny thing about it is two of my friends that I met jokingly say that we met in our past lives. My one friend was a Hippie, the other an exotic dancer, and me, as a law enforcement officer somehow crossed paths with both of them.
Now, you can draw whatever conclusions you wish: 1) drunken imagination, 2) past-life, 3) past-life of a DNA (I’ll explain that another time), 4) ghostly possession. I don’t know.
Saturday, December 5, 2015
Question of the Day - When did you last feel anxiety or afraid?
Oh that one is easy. It would be when I had my second of what was to be four appointments with the denturist before the 'big day'. Most of you don't know this, because you don't really need to, but I have bad teeth. They aren't as bad as some but mine are plagued frequently with cavities, no matter how much I brush and take care of them.
After four decades I am left with a total of eighteen teeth, six along the top and twelve on the bottom. The top teeth are literally half gone, pulled over the years because a $200 extraction is far cheaper than a $1,500 crown. In the end the teeth decay and eventually have to be replaced so why bother wasting money saving them? And, my teeth are strong, a result of genetics which is both a blessing and a curse. A good thing because it takes longer for them to decay. I once had a broken tooth in the front that the dentist insisted I must get looked at "it will cause you problems and break any time now". Well, "any time now" was over five years later when it broke and another three years before I finally had to get it pulled. Some dentists are worse than vampires when it comes to sucking the life out of your wallet.
I decided, here in the 44th year, to replace the upper teeth with a denture. Which is NOT cheap. The upper dentures are $1,700, pulling the teeth $1,000, plus fuel and hotel rooms will bring the total to around $3,500. Ouch. And no, I don't have insurance, and no, insurance sucks. You end up paying in about what they pay out which defeats the whole purpose of having the insurance. I found it easier, and cheaper, to just save the money up until I could afford to pay for it.
That being said, the one I have now, is the first in, literally decades, to pass my personal "test" when it comes to dentists. First of all - he listens to what I say. When I warned him that extracting one of my teeth would not be as easy as most he listened. He ended up splitting the tooth and removing it in pieces. Quite the opposite from the previous tooth I had pulled in which the dentist ignored his own x-rays and fought for almost an hour to pull a front tooth that had two splayed roots. I have never felt so much pain in my entire life (because he also didn't listen to me when I said the freezing wouldn't work the same way either).
Anyways, back to the original question. So I went to the denturist and after five minutes her assistant started saying words like "extraction" and "swelling" and what I should do for it. Well, if you have never seen the onset of anxiety in a person this was a textbook example. my stress level on a scale of one to ten with ten the worst I'd say in about two minutes I'd gone from a three to a nine. My heart was beating out of my chest and I was sitting there in a bit of a daze as the assistant handed me things like tongue scrappers and recommended denture pastes for cleaning.
"Oh and we can set up the appointment for you next week if you like?" Next week for ... what... extractions?! Oh hell no! How did we go from several weeks of appointments to being the next one? WOAH! Wait a minute! How did we go from impressions to extractions?! I only found out, nearly fifteen minutes later, that the denturist had decided to just "skip" those two appointments, "if I didn't mind".
So, yeah, that would definitely be the last time I felt anxiety. It lasted until I left the denturist, went back to my hotel, and a few minutes into a TV show. Not impressed at all.
Today, let's talk about "Haunted" or "Spirit" Dolls for a few minutes. I have been researching the phenomenon online for a couple weeks and I'm very curious about them now. This blog will not even begin to touch on the vast chasm that is the subject of "haunted items", just so you know now that this is not the be all and end all of my beliefs on this subject.
First, I do believe that "spirits" or "energies", as I call them now, wander and drift about the places they once lived. I believe that not all energies or souls 'pass over'. Why? I don't know. Perhaps it is because Heaven and Hell belong to only certain mainstream religions. One particular religion believes in Heaven, another in Summerland, while a third believes that everyone is reincarnated in one form or another. And perhaps like there is a separation between the physical and the spiritual then there is also a separation of the physical, the spiritual and the energy. I honestly don't know and as long as I'm alive noone will ever have the answer to this. As I get older I've become more inclined to believe the movie "What Dreams May Come" starring the late Robin Williams in that we, through our own means, create either a heaven or hell. You made your bed now lie in it.
Do I believe a house, like the one I live in, can be haunted? Yes. My friends, co-workers, neighbours, many of them have reported strange occurances in their homes. Here are a few examples: kitchen cupboards being opened by themselves (not one, ALL of them), shadowy figures walking by various rooms, a restaurant with all of the chairs being pulled out from the tables, loud bangs and other noises that just can not be logically explained. I'll tell you about an experience I had the other night. I live in a duplex with two other people, though at the moment I'm living alone again. One of the other tenants, these are all co-workers by the way, left the company and moved out last Tuesday. He left the keys sitting on the bed so I know he was gone. On Wednesday afternoon I was in my room, my day off, when I heard someone come up the stairs, go into the formerly occupied room, then come back out and go across the hallway. My door was closed so I didn't see who was there, but since the doors into the house were locked and I was the only one there... well, you can draw your own conclusions on that one. I will tell you that everyone who has stayed in that room has been 'woken up' between 3 AM and 3:30 AM every morning and there's no clear evidence as to why. I've never slept in the room nor do I have any intentions of doing so in the near future.
Do I believe that a doll or talisman can house a spirit. Why not? And I'm not talking in the scary Nightmare On My Street type way either. Honestly I don't see much difference between a rock and a house as a vessel to possess a spirit - because, when you are dead size doesn't really matter. OK, ok, stop laughing, yes, some maleviolent sexually driven poltergeists will disagree with me perhaps - if they even exist. Anyways, so yes, I will accept the fact that a "vessel" such as a doll, or box, or item of furniture, can house and carry the spirit, entity or energy of someone who has passed. There is just too much evidence on hand from eye-witnesses to disagree.
Do I believe spirits can be evil, enough that I would want to banish them?
At one time I would have said 'yes, absolutely' but then my opinions were tainted by Hollywood and its' lust to sell movies at any cost. I have come across a few of the spirits that wander our small town and I find none of them to be scary or destructive in any way. Most of them are just lost or lonely and looking for someone to chat with or play innocent pranks on. I have yet to hear of anyone hurt by one of the spirits that wander our community.
Does this mean that I do not believe negative entities exist? Not at all. I am sure there are those energies and spirits that are as evil in death as they were in life, and I have met a couple of those over the years too.
I remember one night my girlfriend and I went up to the top of a small skihill built in the city I was living in at the time. We were getting close to each other up near a shed that had been constructed at the top of the hill. She leaned into me and I leaned back against the shed...
am, and have not said, a part-empath. What is that? Well, if you have ever watched Star Trek: The Next Generation then you could compare me to the character Counsellor Deanna Troi. I can 'read' emotions in people (though most of the time I ignore it just to feel 'normal'), sense 'feelings' from objects, and I can 'sense' when someone is lost, hurt or in danger (unfortunately not all of the time enough to help people). I also have the ability to, well, I guess you could say see the future. Now, before you even think that I consider myself something 'special' let me tell you that I believe EVERYONE has the abilities that I do, I just chose to listen to them more.
So, back to the skihill. We leaned back into the exterior shed wall and I had a vision. The 'energy' that I felt was so powerful that it passed through me like a lightning bolt and my girlfriend felt it pass through her body too. It was a feeling of such darkness and evil that I have never felt that intensely before. The vision, well, it was a demon. It took the form of a demon, I believe, because I have that as a visual reference. If I had never seen images of demons before in media then it could have taken the form of a fluffy bunny. I believe that the 'forms' that these entities take are entirely based on our mind's own reference points. The dark demon energy shot through both of us so strongly that we moved like a wave on a lake had pushed us. We quickly went down the hill to her vehicle and all the way down I could 'see' dark figures and shadows moving around us. We got in the car and drove away, I don't know if I've ever been back up there (at night) since.
So, spirits and entities in objects, in particular dolls. I've wondered about it.
I am in the process now of acquiring a 'spirit doll'. Why? Well, if the doll truly does possess a spirit, which I believe it does, then it deserves to have a safe home to reside in. It's really no different than people who invite "angels" into their lives, it's an entity or energy regardless and if it's a nice, friendly one then why not? I think some people get a little crazy when they talk about banishing things and the evils of things. Why should we condemn a spirit or energy just because it didn't "cross over" into Your heaven? I think if they don't bother you, and yeah if it decided to start playing pranks on little kids and such then it would be a bother, then why not?
In my search on ebay, where all the coolest and strangest things are available, I found a large collection of allegedly "haunted dolls" with various 'spirits' vesseled within them. Two have caught my attention. The first is said to be 'possessed' by a 22 year old call girl from a tavern in the western US. The second is said to be an 1800's 16 year old girl, the daughter of miners, who was kidnapped, brutally assaulted and left to die. Do you believe these are truly occupied by spirits? Why not? And if they are, spirits who have been 'left behind' so to speak is it wrong to give them a decent home? As Ebay requires both ads clearly state that the items "may not" respond to the new owners and are strictly for "entertainment purposes only". For all we know they are just dolls... unless, like angels, you believe otherwise.
Now the question becomes, what do you do with a spirit doll? Do you play with it? Do you socialize with it? Do you move it about as it would if it were a sentient physical being? I wondered about that. If I were a spirit living in a dolls' body would I want to lay in a doll bed or sit in a doll chair all day long? I read that one doll liked to look out the window but the caution included not to leave her there too long because it reminded her of her days in the Asylum (committed because of a natural condition that was viewed as an illness). This means that, some spirits, at least, do not like to be seated in one place all of the time. Does this mean then that you should create a living space for them, complete with a bed and chair and a nice green potted ivy (or whatever plant you like). Does it really matter what position the doll is in when it is said that the spirit can enter and leave the vessel whenever it desires?
I'm currently bidding on the doll that is said to be occupied by the young murdered girl. I figure that she deserves to have a safe home and it's fitting that I live in an old mining town. I think that the spirit would feel 'at home' here and certainly not alone given all of the other spirits and entities and orbs and and and that drift around here daily. Maybe if we welcomed such things into our home and didn't treat them the way movies do then we'd come to understand them better. If you believe...
A light play on the lens, perhaps, but until now I've never photographed anything like these and I've had the camera for about three years now. The ones of the field with mountains were taken on the South Forestry Trunk Road (734) south of Highway 11, Alberta, the one with the river was further down near the bridge crossing the North Saskatchewan River, same road.
The thing to note is that there are two scenes here, one is a smoky day and the other a clear day. In all of these the same strange green, clearly, no, perfectly round orb appears in different positions in the photos. The one with sun behind the clouds and the sub over a brown field are taken almost in the same location but days (at least) apart. And, you will note in the smoky one, as the orb lowers in the sky it is actually detected by the camera as an individual light source (rings around the orb affecting the exposure). At no time during the photographing did I see the orbs, and only by chance did I notice them while I was editing the pictures. And on the subject of editing, no, all I do to edit is crop and sometimes I click Adjust colour, but these are the raw photos - no adjustments or editing.
I know what you are going to say, the same things I did, Light orbs, sunlight, dust...but I have taken literally thousands of photographs and these are the first that I've ever noticed something like this in. That alone is strange.
I decided about an hour ago that to help me write in this blog I would refer to a Q&A book I bought from the bookstore a couple years back. It might also help to take my mind off yet another shooting spree in the U.S. It's depressing really, all they ever seem to do down there is kill each other. So, anyways, I am not watching the news, I turned off my Google+ and now it's time to work on this entry...
The question for today is "What details from today would you like to remember?" I guess if I were suddenly stricken with Alzheimer's and I needed to pick three things from today that would serve as my only memories they would be... and yes, this will get sappy for some of you.
1. Earlier today I was passing through the livingroom and pulled back the curtains. It was sunny and mostly blue skies out and I pressed my face against the glass. It felt hot and I wished that it was as hot out there, but with the snow on the ground... at least for the moment. And then I reminded myself I dislike humidity and hot days, but it was still a nice contrast against the cold snowy ground. I want to remember the feel of the heat on my face from the sunlight.
2. This one will be lame too. I'm in the process, slowly, of cleaning up my room (long story for another time) and I picked up some clean laundry off the floor and moved a couple boxes onto the bed. It exposed a section of carpet about six feet long by three feet wide and really opened up the room. For a moment I felt a sense of pride for accomplishing something today (yes, I put my laundry away) and that here was proof I didn't just sit all day on the computer watching Alayna Fender and cat videos. I want to remember that moment when I accomplished even the smallest somewhat insignificant task and felt a sense of pride.
3. And finally, the last one (thinks for a moment). As much as it sucks, one of my team members put in their notice today. I can't really blame them, we're located out in the middle of nowhere and it gets pretty isolated in the winter for a young person. But the sense of ... choice... it is the desire to act for ones own best interests (sanity) that I find a positive memory. It is the passion that brought me out to Alberta, the desire for something that is "spiritually" better. In the end, it's just a job right? So, yeah, I remember that feeling of self-preservation, not in the physical endangered sense, but in the spiritual, mindful sense.
I think that adequately answers the question for today.
Be good to yourselves, and remember, work to live don't live to work.
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